I was born into a Jewish family of Hungarian and Turkish origin in Uruguay, South America. Both of my parents had been raised in all the Jewish traditions but, by the time I was two years old my parents had divorced, and by the time I was eight, both had remarried to non-Jewish people. My sister and I lived with my mother and her husband, who also was Catholic, and unfortunately, an anti-Semite.

         Throughout my childhood and adolescence I was raised between teachings of my Jewish heritage and agnostic/anti-Semitic ideas.  My paternal grandmother was an incredibly loving ‘Idische-mame’ (Jewish mom) and leader of the family.  She wanted to preserve the traditions of our Jewishness, as opposed to an ever increasing secularizing of our family through my father’s agnosticism and my step-father’s ideas of the supposed evil nature of anything Jewish.

         Until I was approximately eighteen years old, anytime I was asked about my religion, I simply said ‘I was nothing’. While I wanted to fit in with my school mates, I didn’t understand all the rites people went through in mass.  I couldn’t be one of ‘those’ who had killed my people, and I certainly didn’t believe in Jesus. At the same time, once in a while I attended the Jewish festivities (which I didn’t understand either) to fit in with my family.  I felt lonely and out of place, and thought no one could understand me.  It seemed that no matter where I went I just didn’t fit in.

         In 1984 my grandmother passed away and with her most of the family traditions. Sometime after that I was on a trip and although I had not told anyone that I was Jewish, I was invited to a Passover Seder. That night I felt so much at home that I realized that I really was Jewish.

         This, however did not go much further until a catholic boyfriend insisted that I convert to Catholicism. At that point, something inside of me cried out, no! I will not convert, I am Jewish, and happy to be Jewish!

         In November 1996 I met Andy and immediately fell head over heals in love with him. As our relationship evolved we started talking about God.  I felt very disappointed with the apparent focus on ‘the money making’ of many churches. At that time I was anti-church and almost anti-Christian. I felt the apostle Paul should be taken out of the Bible and I had no intention of joining a congregation, much less trusting in this Jesus.  As we were planning on getting married, Andy told me he missed his spiritual life and would very much like to regain it with me. Because of my love for him I said I would try, but once again I didn’t think I would fit in, especially in a church.